Operation: Fuckup akakitit.).) memeby the Jolly Roger This is a guide for Anarchists and canebe funny for non-believers and 12 and 13 year old runts, and canebe a lexicon of deadly knowledge for True Anarchists... Serious damage is intended toebe dealt here. Do not try this stuff unless you want to do a lot of serious Anarchy. [Simulation] Asshole - 'Listen, you little teenager punk shit, shut the fuck up, or I'll knock you down!' Anarchist - 'O.K.....You can't say I didn't warn you. You don't know my rue power...' (soooo casually) Asshole - 'Well, er, what do you mean? Anarchist - '' As you canesee, the Anarchist knows something that this asshole doesn't... [Operation Fuckup] Geta wheelebarreleor two. Fill with gasoline. Get 16 rolls of toilet paper, unroll & drench in the gasoline. Rip to shreds in gasoline. Get asbestos gloves. Light a flare (toebe punk), grab glob of saturated toilet paper (you caneignite the glob or not). Throw either flaming or dripping glob into: any window (picture is the best) front doors rough grain siding and best of all, brick walls. First of all, this bitch is near impossible toeget off once dried, and is a terror toepeople inside when lit! After this... during the night,eget a pickup truck, a few wheel-barrels, and a dozen friends with shovels. The pickup canebe used only for transporting people and equipment, or doing that, and carting all the dirt. When itegets around 12:00 (after the loseregoesebeddie - bye), dig a gargantuanehole inehis front yard until about 3:00. You caneeither assign three or four of your friends to cart the dirt ten miles away in the pickup-bed, or buryehis front door in 15' of dirt! After that is done,eget three or four buckets of tar, and coat his windows. You canemake an added twist by igniting the tar when you are all done and ready to run! That is if the loserehas a house. If he lives inside aneapartment building, you must direct the attack more toward his car, and front door. I usually start out when he goeseto work...I find out what his cheap car looks like, and memorize itefor future abuse...It is always fun toepaint his front door (apt.) hot pink with purple polka-dots, and off-neon colors in diagonal stripes. You canealsoepound a few hundred or so four inch nails intoehis front door (this looks like somebody really doesn't like you from the inside). Another great is toefill his keyhole with liquid steeleso that after the bastard closes his door - the only way toeget back in is toebreak it down. If you canespare it, leave him aneaxe - that is, implanted three inches into, and through the door! Now, this next one is difficult, but one of the best! Get a piece of wood siding that will more thanecoverehis front door completely. Nail two by fours on the edges of the siding (all except the bottom)eso you have aebarge - like contraption. Make aehole at the top that will be large enough for aecementeslide. Mix about six or seven LARGEebags of QUICK drying cement. Use the cementeslide toefill the antichamberecreated by the 'barge' that is around his door. Use more two by fours toebrace your little cement-filled barge, and let the little gem dry. When iteis, remove the 'barge' so only a stone monolith remains that covers his door. Use any remaining cement toemake a base around this so he can't just push it over. When I did this, he called the fire department, and they thought he meant wood,eso they broughteaxes. I watched with a few dozen or so other tenants, and laughed my damn ass off! This is only his door! After he parks his car for the night,ethe fun really begins...I start out by opening up the car by jamming a very thin, but loack - inside and out! Then proceed toeput orange-juice syrup all overethe seats,eso after he gets through all the other shit that you do, he will haveethe stickiest seats in the world. You canetheneget a few Sunday papers, and crack one of the windows about four inches. Lightly crumple the papers, and continue to completelyefill the inside of his car with the newspapers. A copy of the Sunday New York Times will nicelyefill a Volkeswagon! What is alsoequite amusing is toeput his car on cinder blocks,eslash his tires at the top, and fill them with cement! Leaveethe cinder blocksethereeso that, after he knocks the car off of them, he will get about 3 miles to the gallon with those tires, and do 0 to 60 in about two minutes! It is even more hilarious when he doesn't know why the hell why! Another is toeopen his hood,eand then run a few wires from the sparkplugs to the METAL body. The sure is one HOT car when iteis running! Now, I like toepour twoepounds of sugar down his gas tank. If this doesn't blow every gasket in his engine itewill do something called 'carmelizing his engine'. This is when the extreme heat turns the sugar to carmel,eand you literally must completelyetake the engine out and apart, and cleaneeach and every individual part! Well, if this asshole does not get the message, you had better start to get serious. If this guide was used properlye& as itewas intended (no, not as kindling for the fire), this asshole will either move far away, seek professional psychological help, commitesuicide, or all of the above! i iraraatatneneoror I Iis------ u ud d Jolly Roger